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Tuesday, April 27, 2010

MY VALENTINE BLUES

feb 13: 2010
8:48 pm

1 maltesers chocolates;check!
2 red wine;check!
3 victoria secret;check!
4 silk lilac lingerie;check!
5 strawberry;(eat half already,but the little left still looks presentable)check!
6 dj peejay's 100 naija love songs on mp3 cd;check!


so i cross checked her valentine gifts for like the 8th time already to see if all are still intact.my girl will be coming over tomorrow evening, apart from the few strawberries i devoured in a hurry, i was happy all was in check to have a lovely valentines day tomorrow.i looked up at the wall clock and its just 3 minutes after 9pm,i cross checked with the time on my phone and its the same time,DAMN!do we have longer days and shorter nights?cus this time is damn too slow.

i sat in anxiety and wished tommorrow will just come in a hurry,im so going to rock this valentine i said to my self.in order to fritter away time,i started my generator again just to make sure it was in a good working condition.you can never trust my "i better pass my neighbour"its got the tendency to mess up each time i have female visitors,if its not plug today,its the rope that will cut off tomorrow i guess my Gen is just as shy as its owner...satisfied with my generator,i put of the engine and locked it up with chains,dnt blame me but its the only way to keep them away from borrow borrow neighbours.Next was my yoruba movies,my girl had a thing for yoruba movies,she loved them so much she can tell you the whole movie after just looking at the poster!now thats sum talent.so i rented 10 new yoruba movies,although it took me a while to convince the video club guy i was not trying to resell his movies.

so i got home 10:30pm on the dot,the weather was so cool and humid,i prayed silently we have this perfect weather tomorrow.speaking of a perfect weather,i went to my room and lifted my bed up with a smiley face,checking to see if my "STUFF" was still in place,i counted the three packs and asked my self if that was going to be enough for the night,in order not to take chances,i borrowed an extra pack from a friend just in case....it could be a lucky lucky day afterall.


Its 15 minutes to midnight so i picked up my phone to compose that romantic love message to the love of my life.Im a very good composer when it comes to text messaging.If they gave a degree for that,i should be a proffesoor in textology(if there is anything like that).i mean i have the perfect message for everybody and every situation,be it a new catch,a crush,a lecturer,a cheating lover or even sugar momies,my texts always gets them reading over and over again.A friend once asked me to compose a message for her runaway lover who he wants back desperately,after composing the messgage,the lover did not only return home,the guy ended up framing up my text and hung it up his wall till date.I call that Ingenuity!

Was listening to our favourite programme on radio and i was almost through with composing when a wicked thought came to my head,i smiled wickedly and picked up my neighbour's phone,put up a hanky on the mouth piece and dialled my girls number..this was what happened.

RING RING.......RING RING....... RING RING............

GIRL:- hello

ME;- hello,this is Shola Thompson(a popular on air presenter)and this is valentines special on WAZOBIA fm...

GIRL;-awwwwwwwwwwwwww,Shol
a its a lieeeeeee....hello Shola?

ME:-hi,we are celebrating the spirit of valentine so you have the golden chance to dedicate a song to the love of your life.so you can dedicate a song to your val tomorrow

GIRl;-thats so cool,i really love you programme and i think you guys are doing a great job.hmmmm....ok,pls play me Banky W's strong thing for Boyfriend,i want him to know he is my heartbeat and i love him till my dying day.

ME:-ok..i got you Banky's strong thing..who is your request going to?
(now im really smilling and adjusting the phone,wanted to hear how 9ice my name was going to sound.)

GIRL;-his name is Bankole Adetayo,pls tell him tunrayo loves him more and more each passing day.
..........................
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................i paused with my mouth agape,Bankole wetin????.who be Bankole?Animal,Place or Thing?i quickly cut off the line and stood up in akinbo thinking if my mother ever gave me a name called Adetayo or Bankole which i never knew of....trying to console my self,i taught maybe it was a slip of toungue or i did not just hear the name she called right....haaaaa..mo ti daran!Gbese ti pa mi o i sreamed gently not wanting to wake up the sleeping neighbours.

with my body all sweaty and my heart racing in top gear,i walked to the fridge in anger and eat all was remaining of the strawberry,i was on the last berry,vividly furious and chewed to bits about the evil that has just befallen my love life when a text message came in.......

sori d fone went
off,d network is really bad.
in case u did not get d name i just called,
its Bankole Akani Adetayo,play him strong thing by banky
and tell him he remains d only luv of my life.
thanks Shola....


.....LO BA TAAN....APA MI TI JABO OOOOOO